It’s one of those days…the kind where you really have things you need to get done…but you just keep getting sidetracked. Not by others, not by crisis, but one of those dreamy slow days where you sidetrack yourself and head off on a tangent until you shake your person out of it and get back to work. Those are the kind of days I do not do well. I do so much better when I’m running 400 miles per hour at full speed, super focused and with a little good French Roast to boot! Because I’m a thinker, lulled time is often a detriment, not a benefit to me. Thinking leaves me questioning, wondering and in general examining everything I do and everything everyone around me does.
At this very moment, I should be working on finding a way to get a larger video file to a venue for a possible upcoming speaking event, and instead I’m writing a blog and browsing for a new wedding ring for my husband. Neither of us have had favor on our side when it comes to our wedding rings. I originally loved my ring beyond measure. A dear friend who is a supplier for many large jewelry chains had opportunity to purchase, at cost, a few precious gemstones per year. He asked us approximately what size and what clarity and then he bought it for us. He gave us his supplier books to choose a setting from and without knowing cost, I immediately chose as the favorite, the most expensive one in that book. He was able to get it for us at a third of the cost. I was so excited and so blessed by the kindness of this man! So with the money we saved on that, we bought my husband’s wedding band and a very nice engagement ring for him as well. He wore his wedding band on his left ring finger and the other on his right ring finger, but mostly for nicer occasions. Eventually, he outgrew his wedding band. So he moved the other ring to his left hand. Then…over time, that one got tight as well. And now, he is unable to wear either. The band has unique patterns in it such as you really couldn’t size it bigger..
And mine…well, we originally decided to have them soldered together. But, when the local jeweler did, they managed to thin one side and now a little spot shows through where a channel-set diamond sits, leaving it flawed. Then one day, I noticed the perfect center stone missing. A prong had broke. By God’s grace we found the stone under the edge of a patio door molding, and had the prongs replaced. But then the prongs were bigger and sturdier, and my once grand looking diamond, looked smaller and more obscure. Many years had gone by, and one of the prongs broke off at the top. I don’t wear it anymore for fear of losing that beautiful diamond in the center.
Years after we bought another, not as pretty and not as worthy, and recently, at a talent show in a large auditorium, the center stone of that fell out…never to be found again. So now I rotate between a hand-me-down ring from my mom and rings that match whatever I’m wearing. So between us, half the time with no rings on our fingers, or none to wear that have the original meaning, and no luck whatsoever with jewelry in general, I feel like people wonder how an unmarried woman could have so many kids running around behind her. There’s nothing to proclaim I belong to someone. There’s nothing to proclaim my husband belongs to me.
“What symbol as a reflection of your love and commitment do you bring today?” I can hear the pastor ask 28 years ago. The ring itself didn’t mean I was married, the ring proclaimed I was married! The ring doesn’t mean I’m a good wife; but it proclaims that I belong to a man and am happy to show it. “What do you have today that is a reflection of your love and commitment to me?” I hear the Lord ask. (The thinking again!) Ugh! Not even a ring can proclaim that. A sign can’t proclaim it. A good old fashioned Baptist lapel pin can’t proclaim it. “How do they know you are mine?” This verse has been my theme for the week and now I know why! “But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, self-control….” The evidence, the proclamation that I am His! They have to see it, they have to know we belong to someone beyond anything or anyone this world has to offer…and they will…they will know we are Christian’s by our love as evidenced by the fruit.
The opposite is also true…if you are not exuding love, joy, peace, long suffering, gentleness, goodness, self-control….well then…… “How do they know you are mine?”